The Love We Lost
by idealbystander
Summary: The story of maturity, forgiveness, lost love and family. Story of Harry and Ginny after five years of battle of Hogwarts. Slight A/U. Please see Authors note.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: This is a post war story and starts after five years of battle of Hogwarts. Harry is 23 and Ginny is 22. Harry and Ginny were in relationship during their Hogwarts years but they never told anyone and they never reconciled after that. More will be detailed further in the story. If there are any technical or other kind of faults, please pardon me.**

**PROLOGUE**

_**5 Years before**_

It was a complete chaos. Even the silence was filled with chaos. Harry potter had just defeated Voldemort. For all these years, all of them had longed for this day to come, but what they were not prepared for was the aftermath. It was bound to happen. They all knew this. They all knew that this battle would not be finished without bloodshed. But somehow they were not prepared for this. They kept repeating to themselves that it was bound to happen, but the feeling was not sinking in. It would require time. Time to let go, time to celebrate their victory, time to process how to live again. They were all numb now.

Ginny Weasley had lost her brother, almost lost her _boyfriend_ and she was not even sure, should she go and hug her said _boyfriend_ because all they had done was kept it all a super secret that it had become her habit now, to restrain herself whenever he was mentioned or when he was present there even physically. All she wanted to do was cry her eyes out, scream so loudly that it snap her out from the numbness she was feeling or go and launch herself on her boyfriend to show how grateful she was that he was alive, that it's okay, _that it will be all okay eventually._

But she couldn't do any of it. She had to be strong for her parents, her mother and George! _Oh George!_ She was not even sure if he was even breathing anymore. It had been two days and he hadn't said anything to anyone, in fact he did not even come out of the room once. It was all just a broken mess and all the damaged ones were left to pick up the pieces. And about the said boyfriend, she did not see him in two days too. Last she saw him was in great hall after the battle and even at that time he was under the invisibility cloak but she knew that he was there. And it was clear that he knew that she knew he was there and it was also clear that he did not want to see her at that time.

She was sitting near the blake lake and she didn't even know when she slept there. When she opened her eyes sun was about to set and a boy with spectacles and a lightening scar was sitting near her.

"Hey, when did you come?" she asked.

"Just…. You were looking so peaceful so didn't want to disturb you." He said.

"How are you Harry?" She eventually asked.

"Yeah…. I'm okay. Ginny…I'm so sorry."

"What for?... You know it's not your fault and no one blames you."

"I Know…. But even if you do, you have every right to…"

"Why are you here Harry?"

Harry was silent for a minute. May be he should not have come. It's all so soon. She is already hurting. But it's needed to be said. She didn't deserve anymore waiting.

"Ginny…. Your brother, your family… they are everything to me. I've hurt your family so much already and …. Knowing that I had done so much to hurt them intentionally, going behind their back and getting involved with you and then breaking up with you… I know that I'm sounding like a prick to you…. But you and your family deserve much better than that." He said after the uncomfortable silence.

"Oh wow! So Harry Potter has come here to break up with me! _Again! _In case you have forgotten Potter, we already broke up! So I really don't need your pathetic excuse of 'deserving much better' line anymore. You know I should have been more surprised but I already knew. When after the battle all I wanted to do was be near you… you purposely done everything to not come near me, or maybe I'm giving myself so much credit! You might have much better things than to seek me and finally after two days you came just so you can break up with me! I know you can not give me much, but at least give me some respect Potter!"

"Ginny… maybe I can not explain this to you but maybe I'm doing this because I respect you so much! I have never put myself first in my whole life, and at this point I can not even think about it. And I know that to put you as priority I will have to make myself and my feelings priority too. I can not put you behind for greater good or to make some else happy. I can not do this to you again and I can not promise you that it will not happen. Maybe someday I will be able to make my happiness a priority without feeling guilty about it but I'm not there yet. And you deserve much better than that. Please try to forgive me Gin."

How can she not break down when he had done everything to put a closure on their relationship and then had a nerve to call her Gin. All she wanted to was cry so hard, may be this one last time she is going to waste her tears on Harry Potter. One last time. But definitely not in front of him.

"Listen Harry…. You don't have to worry that I was once your girlfriend! And no matter how much it pains me to admit it to you but my family needs you as much as you need them. So don't try to distance yourself from them on my behalf. They really need you. And if you are done from here… you can leave. I don't have anything to say to you."

As she heard his footsteps fade… she could not control her tears. She cried for everything, her dead brother, her hurt, her broken family and finally losing the love of her life, the boy named Harry Potter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 1**

**I learned How to carry on….**

* * *

"Miss Weasley, How does it feel like to be the top ranked chaser for two consecutive years and it was a great year for you, as you also played for World Cup and contributed significantly for English Team win?"

"I feel really honored to be able to pursue my passion as my Job. That is the most special feeling for me and everything else that comes up with that is an added bonus. And yes this year had been the most fulfilling. It's an honor to play for your country, and as I see all these appreciations, I want to tell every little child out there that no matter who you are, where you are from, never stop believing in your dreams."

"Miss Weasley, one last question. You haven't dated anyone since your last boyfriend six months back. Are you waiting for someone special?"

"Who is not waiting for someone special? But seriously, like you said, this year I had been concentrating so much on my game due to World Cup and back to back matches and wanted to give as much time to my family as I could. I could not spare anytime for a new relationship."

"Or is there any secret relationship we don't know about?"

"I am not a reporter. That's your job to find out. Thank you. I think we are finished here."

Her manager Rhea was behind her so much to give one on one interview to this reporter and she could admit that it was a good interview, if they could leave the gossip part about her dating life. But she understood that it's a part of their job and people are interested in hearing these gossips, so she sometimes had fun too by leaving things hanging by not denying as well as not accepting. It was fun.

Rhea has proved herself to be a blessing to her, managing her PR and schedule so good that she has so much time to concentrate on her game without bothering about unnecessary things. She was with her from last two years and she has become one of her closest friend.

"Hey Ginny… Adam told me it was a good interview. "

"Yes it was. You are a lifesaver."

"Believe me Ginny… you are the easiest client ever. What a year, Right?"

"True…. Sometimes it all feels too good to be true, Rhea. Sometimes I feel like I am having the best time of my life and I'm getting too much attached to it, at the same time I know that it's not permanent…"

"Ginny… nobody deserves this more than you and of course it's very natural to get attached to success…. But I know you and your family enough to know how grounded you lot are… you accept as well as leave things with dignity….so don't worry about it. Enjoy Ginny... you deserve it. So tell me where are we going tonight? You were saying something earlier?"

"Oh yes! We are going to meet Ron, Hermione, George and Angelina. They wanted to discuss something and we already had plans to go out, so problem solved. We are all going to the same place."

"Oh but Ginny… they are your family and may be they wanted to discuss something personal. I don't want to intrude."

"Rhe… you are very professional and I respect you for that…. But you are one of my closest friend too…. and in my family friends ARE family. So don't worry about it… Get dressed or we will be late!"

* * *

"Hey Ginny… So good to show up only an hour late! And I saw you brought your little Rhea too. How funny is that?" George said after pulling Ginny into a big hug.

"Not very… So guys how are you all?" Ginny said, trying to get out of George's grip, while he kept pulling her back.

"We are all good Ginny and Rhea so good of you to join us… we always tell Ginny to bring you sometimes. How was the interview?" asked Hermione, always the polite one.

"Yeah it was good. And the reporter was infatuated with Ginny….. I could tell with how he was asking about her after the Interview." Rhea replied mischievously.

"You were right Rhe…. I should not have bought you here."

"Now now Ginny… is that how we raised you? Intimidating your friend like that? Rhea I apologize on my sister's behalf. You can most definitely give me that reporter's number. You know I helped defeating Voldemart and I was an Auror for a few years, so you can imagine that…"

"Enough you prat! If 'torment Ginny' campaign has finished can you please tell me what you guys wanted to discuss?" Ginny asked, cutting Ron's 'I defeated Voldemort' speech, which he had reserved especially for Ginny's boyfriends.

"You know I heard in the ministry that Percy is getting infatuated with her secretary Audrey. I heard he gave her bouquet full of peonies and roses. Apparently they are her favorite! I don't know if that's not a scandal what is!" said Angelina in her most enthusiastic voice.

"What! Percy? Our Percy? Angie you are my girlfriend…why didn't you tell me before? Let a man get prepared for this shock."

"Right… I really want to see the day to day life of this overly dramatic couple, but did we really gather here for this important announcement?" asked Ginny rolling her eyes.

"No…but that's so scandalous Ginny! Our Percy going after his own secretary! I always thought there is some kind of alarm set in him that buzzes whenever he breaks a rule….. and your eyes will stay there if you continue rolling them Ginny. But that's not our news and we wanted to tell you first before announcing it. You helped George so much with everything and especially in re-opening the shop and later supporting me when I wanted to quit Auror department and continue with shop full time. Now we are expanding our business, we are planning for our branches you know that. But we are thinking of going into the wizarding hotel industry. We are thinking of opening our Pub, in fact we have shortlisted some of the places. But before finalizing the deal we wanted to tell you first… Ginny, you are the youngest but the strongest person in our family, who held us all together when everyone was falling apart." Ron said Pulling Ginny in a brief hug.

"Oh Guys! I'm so proud of you both and you deserve it. So a magical Pub! That means life time of free booze to me and my friends! Why you didn't think of this before! Seriously guys! You will rock this. Definitely the best year!"

"Congratulations George and Ron! And do tell me if you need any help regarding PR and Advertising! But everyone knows once you guys announce it, it will be the most anticipated wizarding Pub Ever! Let's celebrate!" Rhea said, as Hermione and Angelina asked them to go dancing.

"I'm tired, I'll just sit here." said Ron and Ginny simultaneously and then shared a laugh.

"As you could dance! you Oaf!"

"Oi! Ask Hermione what a great dancer I am!"

"I definitely don't want to see what kind of dancing you guys do!"

Ron started laughing with Ginny after that. "Can't exactly argue with you there!" He said.

"Oh Gross!"

He sighed after a minute. "Can I make a confession Ginny?"

"Sure."

"You know after the battle, we were all so damaged, we all knew deep down that we would get there, that it will be okay. But you were like a rock to support us all. You picked us all up. Mum, Dad, George, me, we couldn't have done it without you, and I feel so guilty. I got so busy with everything, first I went to Australia with Hermione then I joined Aurors, so Harry wouldn't feel left out and helping George simultaneously. In all this, I never once thought how were you coping up? You were so strong, I thought that you were managing alright but now I think about it, you were broken up too, you lost a brother too."

_Yes Ron! I lost a brother and I lost my love too….. I was so broken up that I had no other option but to be strong or die and that was not an option._ Ginny thought.

"It's alright Ron. May be that's what I needed, to be strong for others so I don't feel my pain and like you said, everything worked out. I focused on my family, focused on my dream that pain eventually eased out. I'm so proud of you Ron, seeing how good you are doing in business. I could see you were not happy being an Auror and I know that it was quite a tough decision for you to quit. Because of Harry."

"Yes I was not happy and you were the one who saw that. And when Harry asked me to go on a mission with him three years back, I could not join him and that was a good time for me to quit. Thank you for supporting me at that time. And you see how less has Harry came in these three years and whenever he came, you were not here. You were always busy with your seasons. I could not have done that and I am truly happy and at peace with myself. And you know Ginny! I would never get tired of telling you again and again how proud of you I am. My little sister playing World Cup. Best chaser. I always knew you would achieve that. And you know, who else knew?"

"Who?"

"Harry. He always used to tell, you are even better quidditch player than him. Sometimes I think you both grew apart after the war too. You were the one who could always get him to understand things, but after the war you both were so distant I felt. War does that to people I suppose. You both had different priorities at that time and your friendship took a back seat. But you should definitely come next time when Harry comes home."

_Yes the war took its toll on us. But the good thing was, the name Harry Potter doesn't control any emotion on me anymore. One more success. I truly moved on. _

"Sure Ron."

**A/N : Sorry no Harry in this Chapter. But I will not keep you waiting. Keep reading and keep reviewing. Thank you so much.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 2**

"**If you know you are going home, the journey is never too hard"**

* * *

Harry loved this place. Harry loved Africa.

He had so many memories of this place. Some were good, some were bad but none of them were tainted. He was Harry here. Auror, who made some rookie mistakes, who was spontaneous and reckless, who fought against dark forces and saved lives because it was his duty, his job, not because there was some prophecy written somewhere.

He had his share of burden, but none like before. There was so much chaos here and the best part was, he felt that he was just another part of that chaos. Neither he had some kind of duty to stop that chaos nor did anyone expect him to. That was the best part. Nobody expected anything extraordinary from him here. He was just expected to do his job and if he was unable to do that, someone else will do.

He needed that burden free life and if he was being honest, he deserved this life. That was another thing that he loved most about this place. This place had made him more honest about his feelings and he liked it. He no longer felt guilty about it.

But as much he loved being here, he could not call this place his home. Yes, last three years had done so much good to him, it was almost therapeutic. He could feel his healing visibly. He could see the change and due to that he could feel what he was missing. He missed his _home, _his family, his _brother, _his friends. He understood now, no matter, how broken you and your family is, you stick together, that's the only way how it works.

These three years had been very good for introspection. He never had a normal childhood. For as long as he remembered before going to Hogwarts, he was not loved. Then he met Ron, Hermione, Weasley family, Ginny and all of them gave him so much unconditional love, he felt like he did not deserve it. He felt like that he was in some kind of debt and he had to repay the kindness. He took prophecy as his personal mission, Voldemort as his personal enemy and everyone who sacrificed themselves for the cause as they died because of him. Whenever he felt some kind of emotions or feeling or happiness, he used to question himself that did he deserve to feel like this.

He understood now, how wrong he was. He pushed them all away, broke their heart, most certainly _her's_.

The thing he regretted most in his life was leaving her. Yet he somehow knew that the Harry of five years before certainly did not deserve her. So, at that time he did the right thing. And he knew that no matter how much he regret, he lost his chance.

But it also did not mean that he could not go to his family. Now he was ready to go home without burden_. He was not moving on. He was going back. _To those who loved him and he loved back unconditionally.

To family. To home. He was going back to London.

* * *

**A/N: Thank you so much to those who read and reviewed this story. Love you all and belated Merry Christmas and Happy new Year!**


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